PATRICK LAZIE POETRY
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A Diet Plan For Me


When I reached my fourties, I became a little round
Something new for I had, had good looks abound,
Suddenly I was not so happy when I saw the mirror
For I was as big as a buck the male type of dear,
So I knew I had to make a change 
My lifestyle needed to be rearranged,
I was making all the wrong choices you see
A visit to the Dietician brought this up to me,
She said you must only consume sixteen hundreen calories
And as all Doctors do charged all sorts of fees,
With her advice I worked to make a big change
I even got my weight down to my acceptable range,
And my Father will never know because he picked on me
I dedicated my time to lose weight and I have you see.

- Patrick Lazie

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The Silent Disc Jockey


There is only one silent DJ around

He's always putting good music down,

He can't speak but that's okay

You can come to chat to see what he has to say,

He wanted to work for rock masterz radio

But kept telling all the managers heck no,

Even the Magical Blaizin Starr

Couldn't get very far,

Hence the Silent DJ was never employeed

And it was a loss for the listeners since his

skills were never enjoyed.




- Patrick Lazie
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​The Jacques Of Runescape










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